True Friends In Unexpected Places

~ Sam

When we think of friendship, we usually think of the people in our lives who have seen us through thick and thin. The people who we have perhaps grown up with, gone to school or university with, travelled with, played sports with or worked with for years.

We think of the people who we expect will always be there for us.

The truth is that friends often come and go. Sometimes that’s because we have relocated or had a difference of opinion or have just naturally grown apart.

We grow up, we change, we get married, have kids and often we find new friends.

The memories of special friendships stay with us though, as a photograph album in our mind to look back over when we want to be reminded of happy times spent together.

Chronic Disease Changes Everything

Sometimes, health issues can remove us from a “normal” social life that is often necessary to hold friendships together.

Sometimes health can get so complex that friends no longer know what to say, what to ask,  or are so distressed about what is happening to their friend that it becomes easier to slowly let the friendship slip.

We might think that sounds terrible but I think it’s also understandable.

Chronic disease changes everything, for everyone, just like other life changing moments can do.

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As a new life evolves for the person with the chronic disease, around medical appointments and accepting new ways of living with a disability, some beautiful friends will remain but more than likely new, special friendships will emerge….if we let them.

It can be all too easy as a chronic disease sufferer to feel hard done by and that response is also completely understandable.

Life is often changing at an accelerating rate, let’s face it… life is changing forever!

We Do Have Choices

Grieving over friendships that are drifting or are lost, needs to happen.

Once we have done the grieving, there comes a time to reach out and connect again, within our new limitations and with new expectations, of ourselves and others.

My online support forum celebrated it’s second anniversary on the 14th January 2019. I’m so excited that it’s survived and thrived through its second year.

I’m so excited to see such meaningful conversations daily and beautiful friendships and connections being made.

My aim in creating this forum over 30 months ago, was simply to help others as that’s what I love to do. I’ve always believed caring for others is what I’ve been called to do…it’s my life’s purpose.

Caring was at the centre of my work and life before chronic illness came along. Continuing to care in some purposeful way, now helps me make sense of this new phase of my life.

New Connections

The added bonus of the support forum, has not only been connecting others but also finding my own connections with like minded beautiful people, who I now call “true friends”. Such a blessing!

I’m so looking forward to sharing life’s adventures with true friends old and new, both in person and online.

Sam xx

 A FRIEND IS A GIFT OF GOD

 A poem from “Someone Cares” by Helen Steiner Rice

 Among the great and glorious gifts Our Heavenly Father sends

Is the gift of understanding that we find in loving friends

For in this world of trouble that is filled with anxious care

Everyone needs a friend in whom they’re free to share

The little secret heartaches that lay heavy on their mind,

Not just a mere acquaintance but someone who’s “JUST OUR KIND“

For somehow, in the generous heart of loving, faithful friends

The good GOD in his charity and wisdom always sends

A sense of understanding and the power of perception

And mixes these fine qualities with kindness and affection

So when we need some sympathy or a friendly hand to touch,

Or an ear that listens tenderly and speaks words that mean so much,

We seek our true and trusted friend in the knowledge that we’ll find

A heart that sympathetic and an understanding mind………

And often just without a word There seems to be a union

Of thoughts and kindred feelings for GOD gives TRUE FRIENDS communion.

 

If you’re looking for genuine support, care, understanding & friendship, you are so welcome to join my closed Facebook support forum Medical Musings with Friends. It’s a safe place to connect with others living with chronic & complex diseases, who truly understand the daily challenges. A warm welcome awaits.

I’m a Contributor at “The Mighty”. You can check out my published articles at My Author Page

I also write @ Blogs by Christian Women

WEGO Health Award Nominee 2019- Best in Show Blog

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WEGO Health Award 2018 Top 10 Nominee

28 thoughts on “True Friends In Unexpected Places”

  6. Pingback: A great read, from a great friend. – Life is how you live it…

  7. I’ve lost so many friendships, both through them going their own way and no longer needing me to fill the gap I did before, or through them perhaps not understanding my health and inability to always do what they were doing and join in. I spent (and still do, sometimes) so long grieving lost people, wondering if it was my fault, then also feeling resentful at others. I too have found such a wonderful community online (through blogging, support forums etc) and don’t know what I’d do without it. Such a wonderful post Sam, thanks for sharing!  ♥

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  8. I have lost so many “friends” over the years even those who also have chronic illness…I can now say I have many friends, blogging and FB friends. Its funny you often think that people who have a chronic illness would understand another person with chronic illness, but it doesn’t work like that. I have had some question how the heck I can travel overseas with my illness. They doubt I am sick. I have had some question when I fly to Perth or Sydney to be with family and they see the “happy snaps” on FB and again think well if she can do that then she can’t be as sick as she says.

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  9. And look how much you’ve achieved in a year Sam!! With everything you’re going through, some things about you haven’t changed one bit. You’re still working hard to bring women together. Still love reading your writing, I love your perspective. Sending you love, Kristianne

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    1. So lovely to hear from you Kristianne. You have made my day💗 Thank you for your beautiful encouragement. I’m so glad to see you are still forging ahead with your career. So miss working with you.
      Lots of love xx

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  11. A lovely post and so very true. I’ve met some fantastic people since I’ve started blogging and they are definitely becoming friends of mine.
    It’s great you have set up such a group that allows people to support and ‘meet’ each other.

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  12. Thanks Gemma. The blogging world really does have some wonderful benefits that I hadn’t considered when I started. I love the support and friendship offered from other bloggers. Very special xx

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  14. I have always believed that if it is meant to be it will be, and that is especially true when it comes to friendships. Sometime we don’t realize but losing these people that we thought were our friends is one of the best things that could happen to us. I am so glad you found the true friendship and support that you needed!

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    1. Thanks Rebecca, I agree completely. I also think that sometimes people are brought into our lives for seasons, for particular reasons and then go on their way. These kinds of friendships have been among some of my most special xx

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  16. I wrote an essay on “true friendship” when I was taking some college courses at the age of 32. The subject of friendship is something that most all of us have both good and painful memories attached with them. I know that it definitely does add a new challenge when dealing with chronic health but I have also come to a different place within myself and relationship with God. I used to thrive off of my friendships but now I view them as truly extra blessings the Lord provides and I’m so thankful for the faithful ones I have that don’t let my illness get in the way.

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    1. Ivana, I’ve lost touch with friends over the years too. I tnink it’s a natural evolvement as life changes for us and friends. Often old friends will pop into my mind which always serves as a good reminder to pray for them and remember good times together. xx

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  18. It is always good to have friends. As we move through life some come and go. I try my best to cherish the time I spend with friends. Beautiful post!

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