My Chronic Illness Clown For The Day!

“I’m going to be your clown for the day”

These are the words my husband greeted me with, as I munched on my cornflakes. I knew instantly why, but I imagine his statement will require some explaining.

I had a crazy idea I could take on a bigger workload. As my regular readers will know, I’ve been spending some time re-evaluating my priorities. I’m cutting back on my existing commitments, just a little where I can, so I’m able to accept new adventures.

Well, turns out I may have bitten off more than I can chew. Some of my new commitments are bigger than I anticipated and just a little bit stressful. I won’t go into full details, as others are involved, but I was pulling out what’s left of my hair as I tried to resolve a tricky situation.

I love the work I’ve started and want to continue, even though I can walk away if I need to.

Exhaustion and stress causes the pain, from my bone disease and widespread broken bones, to escalate. It’s already at peak levels so an increase is something I need to avoid at all costs.

Thankfully I have good breathing techniques, which keep me as calm as possible, but there are times when life just throws everything at you at once. Or that’s what it feels like! Not only was I dealing with a tricky work relationship, our laptop decided to die and needed rebuilding, my right ankle broke and I couldn’t weight bear and my new wheelchair was being delivered. The last bit sounds great but it involved 2 hours with my beautiful occupational therapist and the wheelchair technician. The day before I’d had a 2 hour visit from my physiotherapist to help me manage my ankle fracture.

It was all too much.

Breath Brake

What I needed was a breather, time out, something nice to come my way.

I love how, when we are often at the end of our tether, there is a little surprise around the corner to make us feel life isn’t all that bad.

I have a lovely new friend in the US, Melissa, who has interviewed me on her Podcast, I Am Not My Pain. It will be aired late September and I’m so excited I’ll be able to share it with you soon.

Out of the blue and with perfect timing, I saw an email in my inbox from Melissa and I eagerly opened it. She’s always so lovely and up to something inspiring and encouraging . A complete breath of fresh air. Her email filled me with excitement!

“The Heroes Circle is a global healing and wellness initiative inspired by the children of Kids Kicking Cancer. Their mission is to ease the pain and trauma of children while empowering them to heal physically, spiritually and emotionally. Children all over the globe are taught therapeutic meditation and breathing techniques to help reduce their pain, feel more powerful in their situation, and most importantly, give each of them an important PURPOSE—to teach these techniques to the world

Would you be interested in meeting with me again to learn these meditation techniques? You would be supporting thousands of incredible little heroes to fulfill their PURPOSE! No strings attached. I would show you two quick videos about the Heroes Circle. You would learn a meditation technique called the Breath Brake. Afterwards, you would share how the children inspired you and how you will use the Breath Brake. I would share your comments with the children and on our social media……”
Melissa’s email

This was just what I needed. Yes, yes, yes! The video of the children was just beautiful and the breathing technique, while not dissimilar to what I regularly use, had a slightly different spin on it. My heart melted and I adopted their technique straight away.

I loved that Melissa helped me more than she could know and I was able to help her, by endorsing this beautiful initiative and pain management tool.

I quickly sent her a few endorsement quotes to use in any way she liked, to promote the work of the Heroes Circle and Kids Kicking Cancer. The first of my quotes was shared today.

I have used a breathing technique to help manage my pain for a number of years. For me it has always been a forrm of prayer, as I ask God for strength to accept and conquer my pain as I breathe in and out. The concept taught by the beautiful Kids Kicking Cancer children, of breathing in the light and blowing out the darkness, is so perfect. I can visualise the darkness of my pain being blown away. Power, Peace and Purpose aligns with my own mantra of “chronic illness is a part of our life, not all of our lives.

The message these children are sharing through the “breath brake” technique is purely inspiring. They are definitely making a difference to so many people globally, in need of help to deal with life’s challenges, and they have encouraged me so much to continue to breathe! “

Send In The Clown

So back to my clown. I thought my husband would see my stress, increasing workload and give me a good lecture! I was expecting to be told I had taken on too much and I needed to quit. I would have happily agreed at this point.

I was so wrong.

He had some kind of personality change which took me completely by surprise. He decided what I had committed to, was all really important work and his job was to support me.

So, send in the clown. He’s not always happy all day, so to commit to being a clown and keep me smiling, was really special. He did such a great job. It was honestly enough just to have him enter the room I was working in, with a huge smile on his face and say, “here’s your clown, how can I help you?” He continued this happy countenance from breakfast to bedtime. I was so impressed!

Between my clown and my new “Breath Brake” technique, I not only survived the challenges I was facing, I actually thrived. I achieved more than I thought possible, despite excruciating pain. I even began to feel my normal peaceful countenance return.

Sometimes, when we feel like running away from difficult situations, it’s worth stopping to breathe and reassess what we are stressing about. It’s worth spending a little time clowning around, whatever that looks like to you. Laughing helps release the endorphins which help us relax. It really can be the best medicine.

When we relax we can think more clearly and often we find solutions to the challenges we are facing.

“Breathe in the light, breathe out the darkness” , and don’t forget to clown around a little!

Take care,

Sam xx

If you’re looking for genuine support, care, understanding & friendship, you are so welcome to join my closed Facebook support forum, Medical Musings with Friends . It’s a safe place to connect with others living with chronic & complex diseases, who truly understand the daily challenges. A warm welcome awaits.

My book “My Medical Musings”, is published by Imaginewe Publishers and available now to purchase as a paperback or e-book.